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1. |
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Burn a clock with your fire starting eyes
You stand very tall but we'll beat you down to size
The best way to explain it is that a dog puked on a ham
My feet turned into chocolate but that's just how I am
Football player fumble ball
Referee make big call
Crowd dumb cheers
Bob spills beers
We want our hearts to be a grape so dad will be amused
Arms fell off and jesus barked which just made mom confused
Snapped in the ass by a towel is an awful way to die
Ice cream made from paper clips is great when served with pie
Chorus
Tony can't stop going shit because it's a full moon
The man who is on the news looks like a big buffoon
What's the harm in knitting? It's better than an owl
So we'll all fall down the stairs and empty out our bowels
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2. |
Fascinating Lifestyle
02:10
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Drinking coffee is all I have left
Gone is the sex, drugs and rock n roll
Kissed that mess goodbye long ago
It’s fun to be old
Fascinating lifestyle
Exactly the one I said I’d never have
Cookies and too much cheese
It might not sound like rebellion
But it’s the best I can manage
These days
Chorus
I’m watching the news
I’m complaining about shit
I guess it makes me feel like
I’ve made a contribution
Chorus
I wonder how much more of this
I have to look forward to
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3. |
Negative Eight Million
01:55
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It’s a lot of fun to know that you really won this election
Oh yeah you did
You won it by negative eight million votes
Look at all your followers refusing to listen to you now
They say that the vaccine is so wrong for them
And so then
If they don’t get vaccinated
Maybe they’ll die
Then who will vote for you?
It’s a really weird problem
You like to take credit for the vaccine
But now they said that it’s evil
It infringes upon their freedom
Oh, that’s too bad
Who’s gonna vote for you now?
Who will vote for you?
If they happen to die?
Then you can win by negative one hundred million votes
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4. |
It's All Ours
01:48
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Special? Are we really?
Let’s not pretend
Let’s find the inside of a cave
One that’s filled with shit
We’ll live there for a while
And by that, I mean forever
Pretty cool isn’t it?
Get lost, this is our cave
You can’t even have
One square millimeter of it
It’s all ours
And we need every bit of it
There’s no room to spare
Even though it goes on for miles
We need all of that for ourselves
We can’t share our cave
Our shit filled cave
It’s our magic time
Fuck you
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5. |
Perfect Rhyme
02:28
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Cut to pieces
Cut to ribbons
And what does it do for you?
More than you know
Liberace
Mouse feces
And that's a perfect rhyme
Taken apart
Taken to task
And what does it get you?
Only a headache
James Joyces' Ulysses
Koala feces
Another perfect rhyme
Lost at sea
At a loss for words
And does anyone appreciate it?
Not a one of us
Eric Boucher
Llama dung
A rhyme once again
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6. |
Eighty Brains
01:27
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Eighty brains got tossed in the grass
Over there near the portable toilet
As long as no one steps on them
They should still be useful for something
But we’ll just have to wait and see
Once someone tries to put those things
Into action
Everything will become clear
But hamburgers are best for working things out
You are not even going to believe
How much anarchy will appeal to you
Next
After you feel the stiffness of a brain that you found right out in the grass next to the portable toilet
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7. |
Puking on a Clown
02:10
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Connect a diamond to a toad with a length of elastic
Don't listen to them when they say such an action is too drastic
Our teeth began to fall apart because we wore a shirt
Puking on a clown certainly can never hurt
Charming locks of hair have been used as a garnish at your favorite high-end restaurant. You are willing to pay $35 for the privilege of ordering this dish
Hairpin, lightbulb and musical mice
Hate them once, love them twice
Ambivalence is the best way to go
Pissing your name into the snow
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8. |
A Bunch of Dummies
01:45
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When you were 10 years old
And you first ate a tab of acid
Your parents were supportive of your endeavors
They knew you were exploring
Trying to find your way in the world
Your He-Man action figure got pregnant
Everyone thought you were the father
Dummies
And at age 11 you stabbed a kangaroo to death
When you were at the zoo
Fifteen kids watched and laughed
It was real confusing to the media representatives who had gathered for a reason that we couldn’t understand
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9. |
Being Mean to Everyone
01:04
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Being mean to everyone
Is fucking cool as fuck
It’s certainly a lot greater
Than acting like a human being
That’s straight up for squares
And you might as well just
Quit your entire life
If that’s the way you’re planning
To behave
Cruelty is excellent
Way better than compassion
Put all that empathy in the garbage
Or jam it up your ass
What a damn waste
Of human behavior
To get along with one another
Dumbass
Purely
You are a dumbass
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10. |
Stan the Man
02:05
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I'll never graduate if I'm as dumb as you are
I put all my leftover Razzles in a jar
I accidentally only listen to Bauhaus these days
My skin is bleached by the sun's rays
Quit while you still can
Review the statistics of the ballplayer they call Stan the Man
Pizza crusts left on GG Allin's grave
Ain't no question in your mind, this is the man who saved
Saved you from yourself saved you from the world
And it's the reason your pubic hairs are curled
Chorus
Words are hard to spell that's not my fault
A very good hurdler was named Willie Gault
One day long ago, I removed my own spleen
You always thought Greg Ginn was the lead singer of Queen
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11. |
Only Greg
02:25
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A broken burrito split the earth into about 34 chunks
Much like an atomic bomb would or a dozen pissed off monks
Hurtling through space, we can't help but smile
At the human entrails sitting there in a pile
Who knew it would end this way
Obviously only Greg
No alien shot lazers down from the sky
Only the knife of some paraplegic guy
It's monumentally difficult to really care
We are only going to wipe our asses with your Care Bear
Chorus
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